Liza and I went to school together.  Her Grandad used to take me to ballet classes and her Nan is the reason that I’m frightened of small dogs.  She is, without a doubt, one of my favourite people on the planet and I love her as if she were part of my family.  Now to be honest, I’m not really sure where to start with Ben.  On Facebook, his description is ‘ridiculous man’ and I think that this sums him up pretty well.  He is unique.  He’s interested in everyone and everything and he genuinely has a heart of gold.  He wants to make the world a better place in the most insane ways possible.  If you met him you would not forget him, that’s for sure.  

So, you ask, what possessed me to match this pretty, kind and funny girl with this amazing but crazy guy?  Well, as with all our finest matches, I can’t quite put my finger on it.  They just fit.  I can even remember the very class I was in when I first had the idea that the two of them should ‘get it on.’  On paper they don’t make sense at all.  But in the flesh, something about their shared sense of ambition, combined with their laid back approach to life, just seemed to make sense to me.  

Having learned as much about relationships as I have, I can tell you that looking back - without even realising it – they both dealt with the early days beautifully.  Liza, ever the lady, was caring, flirty and fun.  Ben, without losing his ‘cool’ was gentlemanly, affectionate and not afraid of admitting that he was interested in Liza.  Neither of them tried to ‘play’ the situation, but rather went with their feelings and got to know one another.  

Now at the beginning of a new romance, you definitely don’t want to appear too keen, but there is something to be said for just going with the flow.  I reckon that it’s much much simpler this way.  We all know of ‘The Game’ and other psychological techniques used in the early stages of dating – and these things do work, BUT they rarely lead to a relationship.  If you can’t see any potential then by all means follow Neil Strauss’s words to the letter (his tips work for girls too by the way), but if you think that at some point there could be something more significant there, then it is a bad way to go about things.  You don’t have to dive in head first like Liza and Ben.  You just don’t have to behave like a moron either – making the other person know that they are important to you is a good place to start and you take it from there really. 

So, having had a wonderful beginning to their relationship, Ben and Liza proceeded to go to university and then travel the world together.  They are now living in New York and building up a small empire between them. Throughout the years they’ve encountered far more than their fair share of misfortune, but amazingly, one thing they’ve managed to maintain is their sense of fun together.  They party, hang out, go to gigs, explore new places and basically have a good laugh.  I think that’s the key to it really.  Can you be yourself with this other person in all these different situations?  Does this person challenge you, surprise you and make you laugh?  Do you have enough common interests that you can relate to one another, yet enough differences that you can maintain your own independence?  In other words, is there enough to keep you interested for ten years at least? 

Luckily for Ben and Liza the answer to all these questions is ‘yes’ and I am thrilled to tell you that on Saturday Ben Croft orchestrated one of the most amazing proposals of all time.  The two of them will be Mr and Mrs Croft in little over a year and Liza has very kindly asked me to be her Maid of Honour!!!!!!!!!  I am of course delighted to be awarded such a task.  It’s not been easy for them to get here, but they have, and the people who love them couldn’t be happier.  So to all SiaT readers, if you’re after the real deal, I’d encourage you to have a little faith and make sure that you stay true to yourselves – if you follow your gut, you’ll never go too far wrong.  It wont be easy and it probably wont pan out quite the way you expected, but it’ll be worth it for sure.

Tom Hart Dyke sits in trees all the time. He really does. He´s a world famous botanist, who loves flora so much that he got kidnapped for nine months in Colombia when looking for an undiscovered orchid to name after his Granny (for the amazing account of his experience and subsequent escape read The Cloud Garden).

His family have run their charming manor for over half a millennium. Tom created their award winning World Garden. To see the beautiful, historical estate and to meet the tree hugger himself, visit their Lullingstone Castle, in Kent.

Harry Eastwood is a clever lady. She loves cake. Possibly as much as we do. But she knows that indulging can make our bellies a bit too cuddly. So she´s come up with an ingenious solution: delicious cakes that use sneaky, healthy, natural ingredients so that the taste is the same, but the impact on our tums is totally negligible. Brilliant! To try out Harry´s recipes, have a look at the enticing Red Velvet and Chocolate Heartache. We think we girls might have missed the point slightly, we´re eating them by the tonne.

Good things that have happened to us:

We´re celebrating our second anniversary! We can barely believe we´ve been going so long and yet we can´t imagine doing anything else. Happy Birthday to us! And to you too, as we are nothing without our members.

Lawrence, my 14 year old cousin, has been spending some of his summer holiday here, so he´s been teaching me coding. I´m practically a programmer now. Ish. Less good: he made us feel well old + v unkool.

Dating anecdotes:

A thought-provoking one: About eighteen months ago we set up a couple, Mariam and Jacob, who we deemed very well suited. They saw each other a few times but both felt that the spark wasn´t really there. That phrase haunts our dreams. Anyway, we know we can´t force romance, so we conceded defeat secretly cursing the prolific obsession with lightning bolts. Imagine our delight when we received this recent email from Jacob: So you know how I was looking for someone gorgeous, clever, international and fun..? Well, I´ve found her. Actually, you found her. Wasn´t sure whether to tell you or not, but think it´s safe now. Mariam and I bumped into each other nine months ago and perhaps because the pressure wasn´t there, or maybe because we were both more grounded, but you´re right  the magic kicked in! I can´t believe it, but it´s bl**dy brilliant. Funny to think we´d written it off, considering. Thank you! They are both wonderful people who are totally suited, but their inflated expectations prevented them from having the patience to appreciate what we could see all along. So, the moral of the story: dismissing options too readily, without seeing the potential through, might mean you miss out on some pretty amazing butterflies.

Top dating tip:

Smile. It´s true: if you do it the world smiles with you. Don´t fake it, but if you´re feeling positive about life, show it. People respond to good attitudes. We know it sounds cheesy (us? never!), but it does work.

Next planned party:

Sunday 9th August, 4pm picnic in Holland Park. Meet us on the big field, just off High Street Ken. We´ll put a SIAT banner up, so you see us. Please bring food and drinks for sharing, also footballs, frisbees and any other games. Tickets are £10, which you pay as you arrive. Half the money is going to Task Brasil, who we love. Please let us know if you (and pals) are coming so we save you space. Holland Park Map. In the highly unlikely event of rain (!) we shall all go to the Windsor Castle pub instead. Keep up the sun dances!